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     An Excerpt From the Book


he Lover is the archetype of play and sensual pleasure. Living

in the moment and tuned into her physical environment,

the Lover is deeply connected to the energy of the universe—

experiencing and empathizing with the world of people

and things surrounding her.

With a sparkle in her eyes and a gentle laugh that radiates

affection, all the Lover has to do is show up to captivate her

audience. Whether she is outfitted as a femme fatale or a girliegirl,

there is no mistaking that her behaviors are designed to

emphasize that she is female. A man-magnet she may be, the

woman who is a Lover type usually has plenty of girlfriends in

her life.

Self-confident, poised, and generous to a fault, the Lover

considers herself a work of art. And she is not ashamed to show

it. She is the archetype of the Designing Woman, always paying

attention to the effect she is producing. Her goal is to inspire

tenderness, protectiveness, and passion. Her self-assurance usually

serves her well.

It is almost as if she does not experience herself directly but

instead searches for herself through the responses of others. The

Lover’s self-esteem is tied to the quality of her relationships and

based upon how others interact with her. She works hard to make

a good impression.

The Lover is capable of intense passionate appreciation and

devotion to the people and things that add beauty to her life—

whether it is art, music, or gourmet dining. The Lover’s alluring

enthusiasm for life draws suitors to her side. Though she may

seem full of “feminine wiles,” singing harmony to her mate and

letting him take the lead, it is often a mistake to think that she

has accepted a subservient role.

The woman with the Lover as her archetype is not the least

inhibited in demonstrating her childlike qualities. Her playfulness

brings fun and laughter to social situations. She is determined

to remain youthful in body, mind, and spirit. Unfortunately,

this eternal youthfulness in the woman who has yet to

embrace the fullness of the archetype may appear as a reluctance

to grow up and accept responsibility.

The Lover thrives on stimulation and is capable of intense,

passionate appreciation of all things that add beauty and excitement

to her life. Unwilling to put up with drabness or boredom,

she rushes from one experience to the next, bringing color into

the lives of those around her. This enthusiastic pursuit of experiencing

everything that the world has to offer can also lead her

into trouble.

The immature Lover may turn to self-destructive behaviors

such as sexual promiscuity, compulsive shopping, or substance

abuse to bring excitement into her life that counters the restlessness

and emptiness she feels when life gets too staid or stuffy.

Many myths of the Lover type goddesses are tales of transformation.

Sometimes it is the goddess herself who undergoes

the magical process of rebirth, shifting shapes or forms. But, often

the story is about a lesson that the goddess demands that

another must learn. The power to transform one’s self, to shed

the old skin and start over again rejuvenated, belongs to the

Lover archetype.

Hope, lightheartedness, and vitality are the goddess gifts of

the Lover. As an archetype of rebirth and transformation, the

Lover shows us how to leave behind the parts of our self that we

have outgrown so that we can become the goddesses that we

were meant to be. Her grace and confidence bestow love and

healing to those around her.

Aphrodite, Greek Goddess of Romance:

An Example of the Lover Archetype

The original “Golden Girl,” perfectly attired in a simple

string of pearls and a couple of strategically placed scallop shells,

stepped out of the ocean on the island of Cypress and set the

ancient world on its ear. Never had there been such sensual

beauty and impeccable taste. A new standard had been set, and

the world would never be the same! Henceforth, there would be

candlelit dinners, heart-rending arias, high-heeled shoes and

bright red lipstick (not to mention soap operas). Romance was

here and planning to stay.

Continued . . .                           


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